I Love You, I Hate You

I love you I hate you I love you I hate you I love you So much, I would give my life for this (I hate you) If the bullet was the beat, I would probably die for this (I love you) How many times did I cry for this? (I hate you) I would hate myself if I didn't at least try for this (I love you) What's at stake is bigger than me Blood, tears, how it stains, can't rid it with ease (I hate you) What we have in common is our pain, we're given the keys (I love you) To unlock what it takes to fight for what we believe in (I hate you) Hard to confront the truth of what you see in thе mirror (I love you) Some peoplе you inspire and others you trigger (I hate you) Fightin' in blind faith, led by the internal voice (I love you) You might not wanna do it, but you don't have a choice (I hate you) Will the pressure take me to new heights or be my demise? (I hate you) Will my intentions coincide with what I advise? (I hate you) The people lookin' up to me, doin' everything right (I hate you) But who am I to tell anyone how to live their life? (I hate you) Your pain threshold will determine if you survive I'm amazed by it Lyin' to myself, pretendin' I was never phased by it Maybe 'cause you're in my DNA, that's why I love you I hate you I love you Sometimes, I hate you Always, I love you But right now, I hate you I love you I hate you You made a promise to God to be there for your kids (I love you) You made a promise to give them a life you didn't live (I hate you) My ego won't fully allow me to say that I miss you (I love you) A woman who hasn't confronted all her daddy issues (I hate you) The day will come when you gotta find all the answers to your sins (I love you) Pressures of providin', feelin' unhappy within (I hate you) Or what kind of external family shit up on your plate (I love you) But I understand wantin' and needin' an escape (I hate you) Too much unsaid now, the silence givin' me headaches (I love you) Only through speech can we let go of all this dead weight (I hate you) Even though I'm angry, don't wanna be disrespectful (I love you) Tryna figure out how to approach this in the best way (I hate you) Hard to not carry these feelings even on my best days (I love you) Never thought my parent would give me my first heartbreak (I hate you) Anxiety givin' me irregular heart rate (I love you) Used to avoid gettin' into how I really feel about this (I hate you) Now I see how fickle life can be and so it can't wait (I love you) Should've been the person there to hold me on my dark days (I hate you) It's easier to stargaze and wish than be faced with this reality (I love you) Is you a sperm donor or a dad to me? And still I love you (hard to love tonight) I hate you I love you (hard to love tonight) I hate you Always, I love you But right now, I hate you Always, I love you (hard to love tonight) I hate you On this mission, you live and learn (I love you) The world will show you no mercy from birth (I hate you) How do you humanise your hero? (I love you) 'Round here, you're only respected if earned (I hate you) Half-hearted sorries, can't let your guard down (I love you) To get to nirvana, where do you start out? (I hate you) Angry 'cause they don't meet your unrealistic standards (I love you) Then you realise that they're human and you calm down (I hate you) Sometimes I'm unbalanced and I think, "Rah, why am I losin' my steps?" Lately, I'm paranoid, I feel my life is a mess I'm just usin' my voice, hope it will have an effect He was just once a boy, often I seem to forget Lookin' at Polaroids of pictures secretly kept You know what was destroyed, but you don't know what was left Tryna phase out the noise of who you hear in your head Everything is a choice and anything can be said Is you missin' the point? Are you just hearin' me vent? Or is you in understandin', knowin' my words will connect? I keep you in my prayers 'cause life is short as we know Every mistake you make should contribute to your growth What you choose to avoid'll probably come in your dreams I'm not forgivin' for you, man, I'm forgivin' for me And sometimes I hate you Sometimes, I love you Sometimes, I hate you Always, I love you I hate you I love you I hate you